There was a Young Lady of Niger,
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger;
They returned from the ride
With the Lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.
There was an old lady of France,
Who taught little ducklings to dance;
When she said, ‘Tick-a-Tack!’ –
They only said, ‘Quack!’
Which grieved that old lady of France
There was an old person of Rye,
Who went up to town on a fly;
But they said, ‘If you cough,
You are safe to fall off!’
You abstemious old person of Rye!’
There was a Young Lady of Troy,
Whom several large flies did annoy;
Some she killed with a thump,
Some she drowned at the pump,
And some she took with her to Troy.
His sister, called Lucy O’Finner,
Grew constantly thinner and thinner;
The reason was plain,
She slept out in the rain,
And was never allowed any dinner.
A ‘very old ‘man of Ja’pan
Wrote ‘verses that ‘never could ‘scan
When ‘asked why this ‘was,
He re’plied, ‘It’s be’cause
I ‘always try to get as many ‘words into the last line as
I possibly ‘can.
There was an old man with a beard
Who said,”It is just as I feared
Two owls and a hen
Four larks and a wren
Have all built their nests in my beard!
It’s true that the session has come.
I’m singing the Limerick Psalm.
And if the Good Lord
Hears my word,
Will he help me to pass my exam.
There was an Old Person of Fife,
Who was greatly disgusted with life;
They sang him a ballad,
And fed him a salad,
Which cured that Old Person of Fife.
There was an Old Man of the North,
Who fell in a basin of broth;
But a quick-witted cook
Fished him out with a hook,
Which saved that Old Man of the North.
There was a Young Lady whose nose
Was so long that it reached to her toes;
So she hired an Old lady
Whose conduct was steady,
To carry that wonderful nose.
There once was a man from Harare,
Who bought a brand new Ferrari.
Now the buck and the gnu
And the elephant too
Hide away when he goes on safari.
There was an Old Man, who when little,
Fell casually into a kettle;
But growing too stout,
He could never get out,
So he passed all his life in that kettle.